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“On Thin Ice”
Cast
Batwoman (Kendra James)
Batgirl (Candleboxx)
Ice Princess (possibly Carissa Montgomery or Angela Sommers)
Scene 1 (Abandoned office room)
The Ice Princess had just woken up in a dark, isolated room and found herself tied to a chair and gagged. She struggles to get free, remembering suddenly how the Penguin, claiming to be a ‘talent scout’ had knocked her unconscious with some strange device, claiming it was a camera. She struggles to get free, attempting to cry out for help when suddenly the door to her prison opens up. Expecting to see Batman, she’s a little surprised when Batwoman and Batgirl show up instead.
The dynamic duo quickly rushes to the struggling, gag-talking princess and Batwoman removes the gag out of her mouth.
Batwoman: We have to hurry, Princess.
Princess: Oh! Thank God you two are here! Thank you Batwoman.
Batgirl gets to work trying to remove the ropes that have her secured to the side while Batwoman gets to work on the ropes around her ankles which she manages to get free.
Batwoman: We’re sorry that you got dragged into this, ma’am.
Batgirl (still struggling with ropes): Yeah, this was set-up to look like Batman had done this.
Princess: Hey, no sweat. I’ll just tell the cops that I was kidnapped by some ugly birdman with fish breath.
Voice from shadows: Somebody say ‘fish’?
Suddenly, Catwoman (dressed Lee Meriwether style) suddenly drops from her ceiling hiding place and kicks Batwoman away before knocking Batgirl away from the Ice Princess.
Catwoman (with a sneer): I haven’t been fed all day.
She throws a kick at Batwoman, who catches her foot.
Batwoman: Eat floor! (judo flips her onto her back) High Fiber.
Catwoman springs up with an angry hiss.
Catwoman: Hey there beauty! I thought we…(throws kick into Batwoman’s side and then another to her face, stunning her)…had something together!
Batwoman (grabs her by the shoulders): We do…and it’s called ‘the law!’
Batwoman head butts the felonious feline in the face and Catwoman retaliates by breaking free, grabbing her by her hair and kneeing her in the face stunning her. Batgirl attempts to engage next with her martial arts skills but Catwoman easily knocks her flat on her back in just two hits. Somersaulting to where the Ice Princess is, Catwoman quickly cuts the ropes securing her hostage and the Princess yelps with fear. Grabbing her whip which was hanging from the ceiling, Catwoman yanks the chair out from under the gorgeous model who collapses onto her bottom and she continues trying to fight the duo using her whip and the chair as a shield to keep them at bay. Batgirl throws a Batarang at Catwoman who just deflects it with the chair and snaps the whip at her.
Batwoman: Give up Catwoman! You can’t take us both!
Catwoman: You know something, you’re absolutely right Batwoman. So maybe we should take this game up a notch.
Using the whip to yank Batgirl off of her feet, Catwoman then hurls the chair at Batwoman who uses her cape to shield herself. At this time, the Ice Princess has just gotten to her feet and Catwoman uses her whip to snare her around the waist. In a panic, the Princess tries to remove the whip but Catwoman has gotten behind her and tied the other end around her throat, choking her.
Catwoman (sneering at the duo): Gotta go ladies…me and this one need to have a little girl-talk!
Catwoman then proceeds to drag the poor princess away, who is gagging and trying to cry for help but only succeeds in croaking the word out with a helpless expression on her face as Catwoman drags her out of the room.
Batgirl: Stop!
Batwoman and Batgirl quickly give chase after them and they search around to find that they’ve vanished. Batgirl sees a ladder leading upward and looking up, she can see the white boots of the Ice Princess kicking over the edge before disappearing.
Batgirl: Damn, she’s going for the roof! What now Batwoman?
Batwoman: Split up. Keep your radio on and let me know where they go if you catch up to them.
Batgirl: Alright. (proceeds to the door on the side but Batwoman stops her)
Batwoman: Batgirl, the league has no use for dead heroes. If you spot Catwoman, don’t try to take her on by yourself. You let me know where you are immediately.
Batgirl promises and the two go their separate paths to stop Catwoman from escaping with her hostage.
Scene 2 (Upper levels)
Batgirl was searching all over the place but there was no sign of Catwoman or the Ice Princess. She checked in periodically with Batwoman who was having no such luck of finding them either. Finally she comes to a balcony and looks over the edge where she can see the citizens of Gotham gathered below at Times Square listening to the mayor’s speech.
Batgirl (frustrated): Great! Now where am I supposed to go?
Suddenly, Catwoman who had been hiding in the shadows, grabs her from behind and puts her in a chokehold.
Catwoman (sadistic smile): Straight down, bitch!
Batgirl takes a step back and she judo flips Catwoman off of her onto the floor. Catwoman sweep kicks her off her feet and the two adversaries both spring up into a fighting stance.
Batgirl: You made a big mistake trying to set Batman up, Catwoman. You made an even bigger mistake kidnapping that poor, gorgeous model. And now, you've just made the biggest mistake of all...not escaping when you had the chance. *Now*…you’ve got no chance! You've got nobody!
Catwoman (laughs): Rowr! That’s mighty tough words coming from you Bat-brat. You really think I ran here to hide from you? Now…(takes out her whip)…let’s see if you can walk your talk without Mama-bat here to hold your hand.
Batgirl takes out her extendable Bat-baton and twirls it around with blinding speed before getting into a fighting pose.
Batgirl (cocky smile): Game on, pussycat!
Batgirl and Catwoman charge at each other and engage in a no-holds barred cat-fight.
Scene 3 (Rooftops)
Meanwhile, Batwoman had finally made it to the rooftop and she found the Ice Princess standing precariously on a ledge.
Batwoman: Princess, are you alright? (Princess nods her head at Batwoman) Where’s Catwoman at?
Princess (sheepishly): She let me go. I think it’s because I was able to reason with her girl to girl.
Batwoman (cautiously): Be careful. Don’t move, I’ll get you down.
Princess nods her head and stays right where she is. As Batwoman makes her way toward her, she suddenly hears something beeping and is instantly on alert. She had failed to notice that there was an umbrella embedded in the rooftop on its tip, mere inches away from the ledge where the Princess was.
Batwoman (confused, approaches umbrella with caution): What the…
A light on the handle of the umbrella that was glowing green turns red and without warning, the umbrella springs open like a bear trap letting loose a bunch of baby bats. Like a swarm of bees, they fly around the Princess squeaking and the Princess in turn shrieks with horror and shakes her head swinging at the bats, much to Batwoman’s chagrin.
Batwoman (in a panic): Princess stop! Don’t panic!
The Princess is unable to hear Batwoman over the squealing bats and her own shrieking and she’s still swinging at them as Batwoman quickly races to the ledge to get her down. Unfortunately, the Princess loses her footing and ends up plummeting off the edge of the roof to Batwoman’s horror.
Batwoman: PRINCESS!
Princess lets out a scream of terror as she plummets downward to her doom and a couple of on-lookers suddenly see her falling and they notice that Batwoman is up on the ledge.
Bystander: Hey! Batwoman pushed the Princess!
Scene 4 (Upper levels)
Meanwhile, Catwoman and Batgirl who had been tearing each other to ribbons are both on the floor trying to choke each other out when they suddenly hear the shrill sounds of screaming that were getting closer to where they were.
Batgirl (alarmed): What the hell is that?
Looking up at the same time, they catch a glimpse of the Ice Princess plummeting down from above like a meteor and they both stare upward with horror written on their faces.
Batgirl (open-mouthed): Oh my God!
Catwoman (equally shocked): No…Oswald, you son of a bitch!
As the Ice Princess continues to plummet downward, her hands suddenly grab hold of a flag-pole, breaking her fall. However, she was still in danger as her feet are dangling 100 feet from the crowd below and Batgirl quickly gets off of Catwoman to come to her aid.
Princess: Oh! Oh God…oh…SOMEBODY HELP MEEEEEE!
Batgirl: Princess, hold on, I’ll get you down.
Batgirl reaches for her grapple gun but it isn’t on her and she curses, realizing that it must have fallen out of her utility belt during her scuffle with Catwoman in the floors below.
Batgirl: Damn! I don’t have my grapple gun! What am I gonna do?!
Someone whistles at Batgirl and when she turns around, she catches the cat-whip Catwoman had tossed to her. Batgirl stares at the whip and then at Catwoman with confusion.
Catwoman: Well, what are you waiting for, a kitty treat?! Save her!
Batgirl has a nasty dilemma now: she doesn’t want Catwoman to escape when she was so close to catching her but she can’t let the Ice Princess die either. So Catwoman helps to make the choice easier:
Catwoman (sneering): What are you gonna do, Bat-brat? Chase the villain or save the damsel? I don’t think you can do both and I’m sure we know which one is more important, don’t you?
Batgirl looks at the Princess and then back at Catwoman who is still sneering at her.
Catwoman: Gravity’s a bitch, Bat-brat and it’s totally unforgivable. She hits the concrete she’ll be all twisted up like a rag doll…assuming she doesn’t explode like a watermelon when she lands.
Batgirl looks at the Ice Princess who has tears of fear and desperation streaming down her cheeks and her hands are starting to slip free from the pole
Princess (weeping): Batgirl…help me…please!
Catwoman: You hear that, Bat-brat? Preserve and protect the innocent, remember? That’s the creed you’re supposed to abide by. How would Batwoman feel if you wantonly let an innocent perish to capture me, hmm?
This question really catches Batgirl off-guard and she takes her eyes off the Princess to stare at Catwoman hatefully.
Catwoman (spiteful smile): My life…or hers? The blonde beauty is depending on you to save her Batgirl and you've come so far…don’t fail her now.
Batgirl is getting really irritated now and suddenly, the Princess loses her grip and she plummets down screaming once more, alerting Batgirl.
Batgirl: NOOOOOO!
Batgirl runs and leaps off the ledge after the Princess and Catwoman quickly runs to look over the balcony to see if she makes it. The wind is roaring in Batgirl's ears as she soars downward like a skydiver and she manages to catch hold of the supermodel but they were far from out of danger: the ground was still rushing up at them at 100 miles an hour and Batgirl needed to break their fall quickly or risk becoming a double-order of concrete pancakes on the unforgiving ground below. As they pass by another flagpole, Batgirl snares it with the cat-whip and the bungee material on the whip engages breaking their fall. Unfortunately, the momentum of the whip was now swinging them straight toward a plate-glass window in front of the Shreck Furniture Warehouse!
Batgirl: Brace yourself!
Princess (with horror): OH SHIT!
The Princess quickly buries her face in Batgirl’s shoulder and Batgirl raises her feet up in the hopes that it would keep them from smashing into the window. It didn’t and with a loud crash they slam right through the window, screaming bloody murder together as they plummet and land safely on a soft queen-sized bed with more glass showering them. However, the combined weight of both women plus the impact of the fall causes the legs of the bed to collapse and they let out a big ‘whoa’ as the bed drops to the floor. Safe and out of danger, they both look at the destroyed window before Batgirl lets out a sigh of relief and the Ice Princess continues to cling to her, still shaken up from the ordeal.
Batgirl (to herself with bitter anger): Catwoman…this isn’t over. Not by a long shot!
(End of Chapter)
