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A darker, full bodied blend.
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MetaDude2
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manuelmen
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Re: Hydrogirl: Soaked and Wet

I liked the story and I want the continuation.
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MetaDude2
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Re: Hydrogirl: Soaked and Wet

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tallyho
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Re: Hydrogirl: Soaked and Wet

Hi glad to see you are contributing, thank you for posting your story


I haven't read it yet but just some advice.

When you post your own thoughts or requests either before the story or after it I would break it up in some way - either by more line spaces or perhaps graphic lines like ------------------------- or use italics or a different colour or font

So for example your ending of(I add quotation marks just to illustrate my point)
"
And he left. And it would be more than 7 hours...

Stay tuned to find out what will happen to our precious Water heroine next episode...

Suggestions on what to do to her? Put it in the comments!

"
Reads better as
"
And he left. And it would be more than 7 hours...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Stay tuned to find out what will happen to our precious Water heroine next episode...

Suggestions on what to do to her? Put it in the comments!
"

OR
"
And he left. And it would be more than 7 hours...



Stay tuned to find out what will happen to our precious Water heroine next episode...

Suggestions on what to do to her? Put it in the comments! "


So there is a definitive ending to the posting (or a start if its at the beginning)

It just reads better as a reader experience rather than having them all flow into one.
My personal preference is italics for when I add my thoughts or opinions but entirely up to you and only a suggestion
How strange are the ways of the gods ...........and how cruel.

I am here to help one and all enjoy this site, so if you have any questions or feel you are being trolled please contact me (Hit the 'CONTACT' little speech bubble below my Avatar).
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MetaDude2
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Re: Hydrogirl: Soaked and Wet

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tallyho
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Re: Hydrogirl: Soaked and Wet

:thumbup: MUCH better, yes? :yes:

Dont be afraid to edit and re read your work - I am constantly editing my work for typos etc.
(In that vein you may want to change the BLAST to blasted in the first line)
How strange are the ways of the gods ...........and how cruel.

I am here to help one and all enjoy this site, so if you have any questions or feel you are being trolled please contact me (Hit the 'CONTACT' little speech bubble below my Avatar).
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DrDominator9
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Re: Hydrogirl: Soaked and Wet

I was hoping you would have shown off Hydrogirl's powers before the peril started. With an original character it is better to get a glimpse of her abilities before she is taken down.

Otherwise, nice work here. I'm eager to read more!
Follow this link to descriptions of my stories and easy links to them:

viewtopic.php?f=70&t=32025
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MetaDude2
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Re: Hydrogirl: Soaked and Wet

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VibraSlut
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Re: Hydrogirl Episode 1: Soaked and Wet

... Poor Hydrogirl! :(

Really good story, though. Haven’t got to the next one yet.
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